Posted: 08/15/06

A Reply to Judy Bodmer, a Modern Gospel Christian

In the previous February Issue of Christianity Today, Judy Bodmer wrote the article "My Loveless Marriage - Why divorce wasn't the answer to my emptiness".

I cannot say I thought her conclusions in this article were accurate.

Judy acknowledged the reality of divorce and how it causes all manner of harm to everyone involved. Indeed, it isn't worth anything to divorce. In truth she didn't state the case nearly as strongly as she should have.

But, Mrs. Bodmer did recognize the truth that when we point fingers at our spouse we can be missing what God wants us to see in ourselves. Judy saw that she was responsible for her failure, and that is all one can expect of a healthy evaluation. She cannot speak for her husband's role. "There was only one person I could change: me." But Jesus came to heal those who are sick, not those who are "well", or "good." And Judy was also right when she understood love is not a feeling. Our care of another cannot be judged by emotion any more than whether God's Presence "enters in" with one worship song and leaves with another!

So, I say, "Well done!" to you, Judy, for the courage to acknowledge some failings. But Psalm 37:4 does not mean God is your Santa Claus. When you are His then your desires are what He gives you. I heard someone say recently the misunderstanding of that scripture is at the foundation of the false gospel that removes personal responsibility, repentance and even Hell itself, from the mouth of the preacher on Sunday, justifying the lack of concern for the Lost on Monday. This error has even made inroads into Christian organizations (not the Church), along with their "Judge not unless you be judged" twisting of Matthew 7:1, while conveniently ignoring the context and John 7:24. But, thankfully, there are no hypocrites in the Church. They may be in the building, but they aren't in the Body of Christ.

Truly, Judy, if you love as Jesus loves then you would not be sitting, only singing of your love in Church, but you would be demonstrating your worship of God at home with your husband, caring and supporting him unconditionally. Yes, sometimes a "good wife" must use the "good frying pan" to make her point: We men can be pretty hard headed. But even considering divorce is just selfishness. Our God gave a place for divorce for infidelity, for those too hard hearted to die to themselves, but not for our spouse being too boring or not being sensitive enough. Do you ladies really want girls or do you want men? I mean REALLY!

So, my conclusion from your article is that your attention is still all about you, and very little about Jesus. Self worship is the root of all relational rifts. To die to oneself and live for another is the right result of a penitent, humbled and eternally grateful Servant of Christ. So then, if anyone leaves it would be your spouse. In as much as it depends upon you, live peaceably with all men.

By the way, let's be brutally honest Judy: Considering your financial capability to divorce was desperately wicked of you. Why didn't you notice that? I cannot believe you said that publicly!
 

Judy, unless your marriage is founded on the promise to God that you made to one another, then you will have a failed, dead marriage waiting for it's undertaker. But there is hope, if you will repent. Jesus died that you may be free of the justified wrath of God for your self-centered lawlessness. Not one Christian cared at all about honoring God before he repented. No one cares for what God wants of us, or whether what we do is against Him until we tremble over His anger. "The heart of man is desperately wicked." indeed. "But God commands everyone, everywhere to repent." That isn't a request; God commands your repentance.

So kiss Jesus while you still can, as being precious to you, kiss your husband, as the precious gift from God he is, and be grateful for every breath.
Then, as your mind is no longer centered on yourself, obey Jesus and seek the Lost as He commanded.

BE FREE of the worship of your self and die in the arms of the Savior: You cannot be His until you do.

Patrick J Burwell

OnlyJesusSaves.com
Minister of Evangelism
Church of Living Faith
Newton, NJ

By Patrick Burwell Click here for bio and archived articles