Posted: 04/13/09

Tolerance Isn't Loving

by Israel Wayne

We all know that the word "tolerance" is the mantra of our day. If you are under forty years of age (especially if you attended a government-run school), the concept of tolerance has been drilled into your very consciousness.

The definition of this term has changed quite a bit over the years. Tolerance used to mean being respectful to those with whom you disagree. In 1828, Noah Webster defined "Toleration" as, "the allowance of something that is not wholly approved."

 Josh McDowell defines the "New Tolerance" this way: "(E)veryone's individual beliefs, values, lifestyle, and perception of truth claims are equal...There is no hierarchy of truth. Your beliefs and my beliefs are equal and all truth is relative." (From his book, The New Tolerance.)

This new view of tolerance is absurdly, patently false and self-contradictory. For example, if I believe that all beliefs and lifestyles are NOT inherently equal and valid, is my view just as equal and valid as someone else's? Suppose someone believed that men were inherently better than women, or that people of certain "races" were innately superior to others. Would that view be held as equal and valid by those who support the New Tolerance? Of course not! It doesn't take long to realize that the supporters of the New Tolerance are just as intolerant as those they condemn. They merely draw the moral lines at different places. The New Tolerance movement is an intolerance movement cleverly disguised in a politically correct garb. Everyone is always, by necessity, intolerant about some things. The question is not, "Should we be intolerant?" but rather, "Which issues should we be intolerant about?"

Tolerance is Unloving

Beyond the hypocrisy of relativism, however, lies an even greater deception. Tolerance appears to be loving and accepting, but it is far from it. The root concept of tolerance is actually APATHY. Rather than being a pro-active force, it is a passive mode that ALLOWS something to take place. It means that I do not care enough about a person or an issue to take a stand.

Suppose a mutual friend asked me what I thought of you and I responded, "Well, I can tolerate him (or her)." How would that make you feel? Do you feel loved, wanted and accepted? I doubt it. Instead, you probably would feel that I don't really care about you; that I am merely putting up with you. And if I had said that, that would indeed be the truth of the matter.

The only verse in the Bible in which the word "tolerate" appears (Revelation 2:20, NASB) is condemned by our Lord. On the other hand, we are told constantly and repeatedly in Scripture to love our neighbor.

Should we not care about the unwise and self-destructive behavior of others? Should we tolerate (not care about) their sinful and harmful choices? Are we so self-centered and self-absorbed that we cannot shake ourselves from slumber and try to rescue those who are perishing?

Why Love Is Better Than Tolerance

I have been on the receiving end of this "loving intolerance" in my own life. As an older teen, I had spent my whole life in churches that were amazingly accommodating to the world (tolerant). The youth groups especially dressed in an ungodly manner, enjoyed the entertainment of the world, and thought, talked and believed just like their "unsaved" friends.

By God's mercy and providence, I ended up being a part of a new church where the youth were very zealous for the things of God. They loved and accepted me, but they also saw that I was not where I needed to be spiritually. Numerous times my peers at this church would gently and privately take me aside for a minute to explain to me that a joke I had just told was not appropriate, or that I had spent the entire fellowship time talking about myself and not being interested in anyone else, or that the movie that I was discussing was not something that was honoring to God.

It made me uncomfortable to face this loving confrontation. I had never experienced it before. I received it though because I knew that these friends loved me and wanted the best for me. I am so thankful that they didn't merely "tolerate" me. Instead they cared enough to risk offending me and invest in my spiritual growth.

 This loving intolerance doesn't just apply to teens. It applies to all of us. Let us look for ways to show our friends and neighbors the loving intolerance of Christ. "But speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him, who is the head, even Christ." (Ephes. 4:15, NASB)

Copyright 2009, by Israel Wayne. All Rights Reserved.

Israel Wayne was home educated and currently serves as Marketing Director for the national publication Home School Digest, and the site editor for www.ChristianWorldview.net. He is the author of the book, Homeschooling from a Biblical Worldview, published by Wisdom's Gate. Israel and his wife Brook (also a homeschool graduate) have five young children. Write to: Wisdom's Gate, P.O. Box 374, Covert, MI 49043. 1-800-343-1943 or www.WisdomsGate.org

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